37 replies to this topic

[Hefestus]

Mozda neko nesto zna

Bret's Red Fender Strat was stolen during the last song of Bret's set at McCools in Valparaiso, Indiana on Friday November 12, 2004. (Please visit www.bretmichaels.com/eletters/stolenguitar.htm to see a larger photo of the guitar.)

We are asking anyone and everyone who may know where it is to please return it to us. This guitar has a lot of sentimental value to Bret and we just want to get it back.

If you have any information about the whereabouts of this guitar, please email bmelist@yahoo.com immediately with your contact information.

As we have stated we just want the guitar back. Please contact us if you have any information.

Please post this on the sites or lists you may belong to, any and all help is very much appreciated.

"Bret would like his guitar back. It has sentimental value. There is no way you can sell it, because you will get caught. Bring it back to the next show or a show coming up and there will be no questions asked, no charges pressed."

Thank you,

Bret, Janna, Cris and the entire road crew and band

[Hefestus]

malo gossip,

Aguilera, Christina. "Rude, crude, selfish and disrespectful." "All around mean rotten little bitch." (Though I've heard at least one story of her being nice when she didn't have to be). I've gotten several e-mails in the past several months about her treating waiters and waitresses very badly, to the point of not leaving tips and even not paying the check. But I've also been told that part of her bad actions toward others is the result of her paranoid bodyguards. Stuck-up snot. Prefers women and three-ways; possibly prefers watching women and three-ways to partaking of them. Plays "hostess" to "lavish orgies." Cocaine addict. Has breast implants. Bad tipper. Keeps her weight down thanks to the over-use of laxatives. (Which matches the feces coming out of her mouth). Hygiencially challenged; I've received two different e-mails from staff at two different hotels both saying that she never used the showers, soap, or shampoo in her room.Linked with Carson Daly (Christina, is this the best you can do?), Leonardo DiCaprio (boy, did that pairing turn the Skank Switch up to 11), Enrique Igelsias, Alicia Keys, Lil' Kim, Madonna, and Justin Timberlake.

Carrey, Jim. Unpleasant man, simultaneously rampantly insecure and hideously conceited. Extreme hypochondriac. Didn't make it through high school--and while in high school, according to one of my correspondents, "JC was incredibly mean to every student he could pick on (expecially when he was with a group of friends). Really mean, he'd pick on defenseless "losers" who had no hope of even excaping his cruelty. He would do this every chance he got." Has been known to act extremely childishly on-set, although there are some reports that one-on-one he's not bad. Has sexually harassed numerous actresses. Used LSD when he was a kid. Uses pot at regular intervals while writing; claims that he can't stay funny without regular ganja use. Likes being spanked. Has, however, been known to give food away to the homeless, and I'm willing to forgive him much for Eternal Sunshine. Linked with Lauren Holly, Ashley Judd, Nicole Kidman, Courtney Love, Linda Ronstadt, and Renee Zellweger.

Cruise, Tom. Oh, definitely not a Friend Of Dorothy. Why would you ever think such a thing? No, certainly not. And he definitely doesn't force his gay lovers to sign lengthy non-disclosure contracts before he gets involved with them; that's just a vile, untrue rumor started to bring shame on this quite emphatically heterosexual movie star. Certainly not someone who has and enjoys sex with lots of men. One would never hear Mr. Cruise described as "awkward and inarticulate" when speaking without a script, and certainly never hear him described as "vain, shallow, and pretentious." No, certainly not--the reverse is true of Mr. Cruise! $cientologist. Vain & arrogant. Never graduated from high school. Acted badly towards Nicole Kidman during their break-up, which was caused partially by his insistence on raising the kids $cientologist (she wanted them raised Catholic) and partially because of her pregnancy, which may have been his and may have been Ewan McGregor's. Broke up with Nicole via his representatives. (Cruise, you swine.) Linked with Patricia Arquette, Cher, Penelope Cruz, Rebecca De Mornay, Nelly Furtado, Anthony Hopkins, Nicole Kidman, Heather Locklear, Paul Newman, Lisa Marie Presley, and Mimi Rogers.

Kidman, Nicole. Acted the beard for Tom Cruise. L______. Not a $cientologist--no, really! Temperamental; difficult to work with. Regular at certain L.A. girl bars. Forces her gay lovers to sign lengthy non-disclosure contracts before she gets involved with them. Is generally seen to have been the victim in the break-up of her marriage with Tom Cruise. The divorce reportedly was caused partially by Cruise's insistence on raising the kids $cientologist (she wanted them raised Catholic) and partially because of her pregnancy, which may have been his and may have been Ewan McGregor's. Recently rumors have begun to circulate in my direction that the relationship with Cruise broke up because of Kidman's serial infidelity. Ate up the entire promotional budget at Cannes for Dogville by staying at the Hotel du Cap, so no party, no promotional items, nothing, all because Nicole had to stay at the best suite (one correspondent insisted that this was the fault of the studio & that Kidman gave better PR than a party would have). Bulemic. Linked with Ben Affleck, Jim Carrey, Russell Crowe, Vin Diesel, Iain Glen, Lenny Kravitz, Jude Law, Tobey Maguire, Ewan McGregor, Q-Tip, Naomi Watts (any chnce you've got room in there for another girl? Please?) and Robbie Williams.

[Hefestus]

Men hire 'superflirt' to make partners jealous

A woman says she gets paid £50 an hour to flirt with boyfriends and husbands to make their spouses jealous.

Rachel Bailey from London, says: "It is a simple idea and it works like a dream. It's a service for any husband or boyfriend who feels his partner has stopped paying him enough attention.

"He tells me where he will be with his wife or girl at a certain time and then I turn up and flirt with him outrageously.

"The unsuspecting spouse has no idea what is going on. More often than not she is overwhelmed by the sight of her man winning the attention of another women. It's amazing what a bit of jealousy can do for a relationship that has hit the rocks.

"I have had some great feedback so far and it seems that the service has worked extremely well."

Rachel dreamed up her business venture after one of her ex-boyfriends was chatted up by another woman reports The Sun.

She says: "I felt really possessive and threatened by the other girl. But deep down it felt good to know that someone other than me found my man attractive."

She launched her service in the summer by placing a small advert in a local newspaper in North London, pictured above.

Since then she has been swamped by business. Rachel is now so busy that she is planning to take on other girls to cope with demand. She even hopes to try out the service on gay couples.

Rachel, from Chelsea, South-West London, adds: "Most of my clients are rich City gents who are looking to put the spark back in their relationships."

[Hefestus]

The Joy of Sexual Physics

with Dr John

"Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics"

SEX AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT

Q My boyfriend, Terence, is an adventurous physics student always looking for new ways to improve our sex life. Recently he has been talking about Einstein and relativity, suggesting that we should try having sex at the speed of light or faster. But I am worried. If we were to engage in consensual sex at faster than the speed of light, would I go back in time, so that he would end up having sex with a 5 year old girl? And what are the potential legal implications of this?
Ashweena


A The area of physics which deals with speeds comparable to the speed of light is called relativity. Unfortunately for this question, Einstein’s special theory of relativity says that it is absolutely impossible for any information or matter to travel faster than the speed of light. This is backed up by a significant amount of experimental data and mathematical rigour. However, we can use relativity as a model to see what happens at speeds close to that of light.
.....
.....
.....



full text:

http://www.sexualphysics.com/

[Hefestus]

AOL Admits 40% of Subscribers Don't Have Computers

Leading internet provider America Online (AOL) has confirmed a stunning statistic leaked by a dissatisfied employee last week, in documents sold to Fox News for an undisclosed sum.

"While we vigorously condemn the illegal theft of internal company documents, we must admit that they are in fact authentic," said a grim-looking Joe Redley, AOL's chief marketing officer. "Further, the facts as stated in the memos recently released to news organizations are in fact true; namely, that it does appear that a sizeable percentage of AOL subscribers do not, in fact, possess computers."

Until recently, the premier entry point to the Internet frontier, America Online is now trying to reinvent itself in a high-speed Internet world. Parent company Time Warner said last week that AOL lost 646,000 subscribers in the third quarter, reducing its subscriber count to 22.7 million U.S. members as of Sept. 30. It lost two million subscribers year over year. The revelation that 40% of its subscribers do not own computers could not have come at a worse time.
.......

AOL skim txt

Edited by Hefestus, 23 November 2004 - 17:41.

[Hefestus]

Sorry Everybody

Some of us — hopefully most of us — are trying to understand and appreciate the effect our recent election will have on you, the citizens of the rest of the world. As our so-called leaders redouble their efforts to screw you over, please remember that some of us — hopefully most of us — are truly, truly sorry. And we'll say we're sorry, even on the behalf of the ones who aren't.



Are you ashamed to be an American?

No. Are you ashamed to be a human?


Sorry Everybody

[voja i]

tisuc-promilni, ovo gore je link!
mo'sh slobodno da kliknes.

2 hef:
mojne si na kraj srca i da mu se izvinjavas [ovako indirektno] za u-tagove

edit:
[ pronadjite skriveni link ]

Edited by voja i, 26 November 2004 - 00:25.

[Hefestus]

tnx voja i have in mind!

Blonde jokes to be banned?

Blonde jokes are set to be banned in Hungary after blonde women staged an angry protest outside parliament.

The protestors handed in a petition claiming they were being discriminated against in every walk of life by bad taste blonde jokes.

And spokeswoman Zsuzsa Kovacs said: "Blondes face discrimination in the job market, in the workplace when they get a job, and even on the streets.

"People are banned from discriminating against Jews, or blacks, so why not grant blondes the same protection."

The petition was handed to the equal opportunities minister Kinga Goncz asking her to investigate whether jokes about blondes fall into the same category as religious discrimination.

The petition was just short of the 100,000 needed to force Parliament to debate the matter but Goncz's deputy who spoke to the crowd pledged the government would act to stop any discrimination.

Blondes - real and bleached - protested outside the ministry as the petition was handed in, waving banners with slogans like 'We're blonde, not stupid' and Love us for our minds.

Edited by Hefestus, 27 November 2004 - 03:21.

[Hefestus]

She's a He !!
she's so hot but.... Man, it would be so nice if she's NOT a he......

Malo komentara sa foruma:

johan ---25 Nov 2004 04:06 pm
If so It´s the best looking guy I ever seen..


willis ---25 Nov 2004 01:19 am
pubic hair? smile


Mr.Bill ---22 Nov 2004 05:56 pm
wow thats a bit of nasty!


milo ---22 Nov 2004 04:39 pm
From the land of the rising vulvas..
grin


i know ---22 Nov 2004 12:09 am
its a he, u dicks!!! trust me...


Nigger Bitch ---21 Nov 2004 08:39 am
bakla.com

check it out!!!!


W'eva ---20 Nov 2004 04:52 pm
Cmon, clearly thats no guy...


ronaldo ---20 Nov 2004 03:58 pm
i can believe dats it is HE! no way! she is wearinf a PAD! or its photoshop!


CRYING_CUZ_DA_DICK ---18 Nov 2004 10:27 pm
she'z fucking hott. Goddbye, I'm going to kill myself now. I HATE WHOEVER MADE THIS IF IT'S A CHOP!!! evil


Kegtapper ---18 Nov 2004 11:15 am
Well as much hair she has on her head, it may be a hairy bush and a PAD!!

just my analysis

moby ---14 Nov 2004 09:12 am
She's just got one monstrous muff. I bet there are several birds living in there. Maybe even a bear, hiding in the shadowy depths of her gigantic mound. I bet if you shaved her you could find enough wool to knit 30 or 40 sweaters too.


dream ---14 Nov 2004 01:10 am
this is not a he, she has a big vulva, dude evil


deew ---13 Nov 2004 11:57 pm
looks like she is wearing a cup or something. notice black string maybe one of those mask.


cfo ---13 Nov 2004 09:00 pm
dude thats sick but james mcguire wud like that dick in his mouth


Leapo ---13 Nov 2004 05:32 pm
Maybe it has one to menny rags on(man hole covers)


meop ---13 Nov 2004 05:03 pm
aff!!

[Hefestus]

Britney Spears becomes the definition of "Meltdown." And other mean words.

How do you go from being the most marketable human being on the planet to trailer trash in less than 365 days? It's a simple process, really: Drunkenly get married to a guy who doesn't even know what "annulment" means, annul the marriage that same day at the request of your mother, fire the manager who discovered you at age 13 and made you a star, register possibly the most ridiculous quote in the history of documentaries, forget you're a role model to millions of little girls and attempt to make a video where you commit suicide, grab your fiance's dick in public, get an ugly dog and an ugly husband just so when you're bored you can try to figure out if either of them are actually uglier than you, get fat by eating at McDonald's, become even fatter by eating milkshakes and then throwing them at photographers, become so fat you have to use a photo from two years ago on the cover of your greatest hits album, make everyone who's ever attended even a single class at Harvard want to kill themself, become addicted to nicotine, get uglier and fatter and help the situation by wearing a trucker hat that's also very ugly and fat, go into public with acne cream on, pick your acne and your nose in public, and voila: white trash! Now that's a meltdown.

[dzishn]

Americans weigh down cruise ship

07dec04

DOZENS of seats on the world's most luxurious cruise liner have collapsed under the weight of obese American passengers.

The chairs -- on the Queen Mary 2 -- are being replaced or repaired.
The seating is mainly in the bar and restaurant areas.

Alstom Chantiers, the French company that provided the liner with all its fixtures and fittings, claimed many of the chairs had buckled under the weight of larger passengers.

"There are some things that need to be changed or replaced," said a spokesman. "For instance, there are some problems with the chairs because some of our passengers are heavier than we imagined.


"It's not an English problem, it's probably more American."

An unnamed former member of the ship's crew said: "We do have many large passengers on the QM2. Most of the passengers are American.

"And we do have 10 restaurants on the ship, so if they are big when they get on, they tend to be bigger when they get off."

[Hefestus]

Y O U R _S C R O T U M
"Get the Facts"


Your testicles are an invaluable source of pleasure to you, your loved ones, and your whole family!
But what do you know about your firm, pendulous bringers of life?


FACT:

1. The testicles are oval organs! Beat that! (metaphorically, I mean)
2. Your testes are about 4 to 4.5 cm long and 2 to 2.5 cm round. And that is like one of those gum balls that cost a quarter in a Wal-Mart entrance... Not quite as big as the fifty cent gum balls, or one of those plastic eggs with a friendship bracelet in it.
3. It is normal for one testicle to hang lower than the other in the scrotum. It considered more attractive to have the right one lower than the left. (The opposite applies to European tastes.)
4. Your testicles produce and store sperm. That's like a factory also being a closet.
5. Your testicles are the body's main source of male hormones. These hormones control the development of the reproductive organs and other male characteristics, such as body and facial hair, low voice, wide shoulders, and size of lap.
6. A man with one testicle can still have a normal erection and produce sperm for all who require it. He also will have the good fortune of garnering a nickname like "Lefty" or "Mr. Right".
7. Each testis contains tightly coiled tubes (smart-scientist-men call them: seminiferous tubules) within which the germ cells (reproductive cells) divide and mature to form sperm. This all happens by unknown, magical means and will baffle smart-scientist-men for many years to come.
8. Your puberty is actually a celebration of your testicles producing sperm. Secondary sex characteristics are your body's way of decorating for that party.
9. The delicacy known as Rocky Mountain Oysters are in actuality USDA approved bull testicles. People eat these. I'm serious, they put them in their mouth and eat them.
10. Testicles remind us of our fragile humanity. Bungee jumping and sky-diving also remind us of this. But testicles are free.

Scrotal Safety Tips:

* When hygienically inspecting your scrotum, remember to treat your fleshy sack with kid gloves (or an equivalent glove of soft construction). Keeping your fingernails neatly trimmed will also help cut down on self-inflicted scrotal damage.
* Riding escalators is both fun and convenient. But please remember to wear slacks while you enjoy the mechanical comfort of a moving staircase. And never sit on an escalator tread, even if the escalator is not in service.
* Purchasing a swimsuit with built-in underpants will greatly cut down on excess scrotal-stress during a spirited game of volleyball and the like.
* A lady-friend can quickly become a lady-enemy where your scrotum is concerned. Play it wise and establish a "safe-word" during rough play. The Scrotal Safety Commission would like to recommend the safe-word: "Peachy-keen"
* Get a professional to "size" you for under-shorts. Many scrotal accidents could have been easily avoided by sporting proper fitting under garments.
......................
more

[Hefestus]

dobre patike a?

Naomi & Tyson B. not (M)

Edited by Hefestus, 13 March 2005 - 06:19.

[Hefestus]

HOLLYWOOD beauty Angelina Jolie has boasted that she is an expert at lesbian sex.

Bisexual Angelina, 29, says she knows what girls like, adding: “I absolutely love women and find them incredibly sexy.

“I have loved women in the past and slept with them too. I think if you love and want to pleasure a woman, particularly if you are a woman yourself, then certainly you know how to do things in a certain way.”

Tomb Raider star Angelina, who was previously married to actors Jonny Lee Miller and Billy Bob Thornton, now has two lovers who she meets in hotels for no-strings sex.

Svaka cast Angelina tako treba. life is shot anyway.

[purple rain]

ultra interesantno - samo mi krivo sto nemam nikakav interesantan materijal da doprinesem topiku ali bi bilo super cool da ti, Hefe, ne prestanesh.